Thursday, November 6, 2014

Four years ago...

Does anyone use the Timehop app? I have it, but rarely do I re-post anything. Mostly, I just enjoy seeing what pictures I took or what my Facebook status said six years ago (some of it is actually pretty strange). The other day, Timehop informed me that four years ago, this was my Facebook status:
 
 
 
In the last four years, SO MUCH has happened in my life - not only nursing related things - but if we're talking strictly about nursing, there have been some major changes.
 
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Four years ago, on November 4th 2010, I was probably getting home to my little apartment after a long day of Nursing Fundamentals Clinicals. Or maybe a lab. Either way, I probably wasn't having a good day.
 
Who would have thought today I'd be getting home to my (very) little apartment after a long day of managing a 50 bed unit of very sick people, loving (almost) every minute of it, even though it's still hard?
 
Four years ago, I was still attending BSN classes at the university - the university from which I never graduated.
 
Who would have thought I would have to take the long road - transferring to a different school to become an LPN, working for a year, then going back to school to become an RN - making the BEST friends (and learning the best lessons) along the way?
 
Four years ago, I was "madly in love" with my high school sweetheart.
 
Who would have thought he really was the idiot everyone kept telling me about, and that I'd finally meet a MAN worthy of my time and marry him? (Okay I know that had nothing to do with nursing, but still - a big change).
 
Four years ago, my dream was to work on a labor and delivery unit. I loved the idea of welcoming new life into the world on a daily basis.
 
Who would have thought I'd be working with (mainly) geriatric patients - saying many more "Goodbyes" and "see you on the other side's" than I really ever thought I could handle?
 
Four years ago, I wondered - "Why do I want to be a nurse again?"
 
Who would have thought, even still, that I don't have the answer? But that I know it's what I'm meant to do?
 
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If I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times. Being a nurse is hard. Being a nurse, however, is one of the most rewarding jobs I could ever imagine. There are days I want to tear my hair out, days that I go home crying, days that I don't ever want to step foot in my building again. But those aren't the days that count. The days that count are the ones where a patient looks at me and says "thank you for all you do, you mean so much to me." The days that count are the ones where I can hold a family member's hand while they say goodbye to their loved one. The days that count are the ones where I can reassure a patient, family, or even another nurse - that everything is going to be okay.
 
That's why I wanted to be a nurse. That's why I still want to be a nurse. Because of the good days. The days that count.  
 
 

15 comments:

Kels @ BlonderSide said...

I also have some pretty strange things come up on my Timehop and it makes me question my past selves haha. I work with a TON of nurses in my various wellness programs at work so I second the great work you do!

Sammy Simpson said...

I never would have thought 4 years ago that I would be taking so long with my degree and be in my 6th year of school! It's kind of awkward being in that stage where you aren't quite going back to school but aren't the same age too. But I am so grateful because I feel much more capable! Good for you for keep on keeping on.

popcornsami.blogspot.com

Ashten @ alwaysashten said...

I moved to ATL four years ago and I thought I had it all figured out. I look back now and I'm like "yeah I was a freaking moron. I didn't know shit."

the Florkens said...

Very moving. I know that I don't have what it takes to do a job like that, but I am very happy that people like you were called to that profession and treat it with such dignity and care!

-Kate
www.theflorkens.com

Cece said...

Sounds like an incredibly heart wrenching and sad yet very rewarding job. Not one that every one can do. It's awesome that you have a passion for it and that you are good at it.

Rachel said...

YES YES YES YES YES. I couldn't have said it better myself. I wonder that often, but in the end, it's because my heart is all about nursing. It's my passion. Thank you for reminding me of that :)

Fairy Princess Jord said...

I can't even begin to imagine how difficult it would be to work as a nurse! I'm so happy there are people like you out there because I really don't think there is any way I could handle it!

Casey Aslan said...

Love this, and I think all nurses need to step back and see what a journey this profession is, and how many lives we touch in the meantime. Great post!

The Girl who Loved to Write said...

So cool to be able to reflect at how much has changed!

Becca @ Becoming Adorrable said...

I've said it many times before, I could never be a nurse. It's so, so much, and know that your patients (most of them) leave feeling so appreciative of everything you're doing.

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