Friday, March 13, 2015

Wedding traditions we skipped

Tradition can mean something different to everyone. There are Christmas traditions, first-day-of-summer traditions, and of course, wedding traditions. For our wedding (and wedding planning process) we skipped quite a few things many people would consider "traditional" and our day was just as special as anyone else's -in my opinion.



Sending out Save the Date cards. We were engaged for less thant three months. I think that's pretty self explanatory in that it would have been a ridiculous waste of time, paper, and money to send them out. So we just stuck with the formal invitiations.

Waiting to see each other before the ceremony: I talked already about our first look and our reasoning behind it here.

Tossing the bouquet/garter: We decided to skip this part at the last minute. Before the wedding I wasn't 100% on the idea anyway, being that we were having such a small wedding and only a small number of our guests were "single." I didn't want anyone to feel pressured or like they were being called out as single so during the reception when our photographer asked when we were going to do the toss, Derek and I made the executive decision to skip it. I really doubt anyone noticed.

Wearing a veil. Initially, I thought of wearing my mother's veil. It was a simple circular veil with lace trim around the edges. I had actually worn it for a play in high school. Unfortunately, over the years, between a move or two, it got misplaced. I had intended on wearing it in combination with the floral crown, but after we couldn't find it, I decided to go with the crown alone with a little ribbon. The flowers really complemented the "style" of our wedding, along with fitting my personality to a tee - and I still felt like a bride, even without the veil!

Dances. The only traditional dances we did were mine and Derek's first dance and then I shared a dance with my dad. When I said that Derek and I were opposites, I really meant it. I absolutely LOVE to dance - and I get it pretty honestly. At one point, I looked over on the dance floor and saw my parents (alone) getting down to "Shake Your Booty." Derek's mom and dad, however, barely stepped on the dance floor. At first I wanted Derek and his mom to have a dance but they were both not comfortable with the idea so I didn't push it.

Ring bearer/flower girl. Yes, the pictures are adorable of the little person walking down the aisle with a sign that says "Here comes your girl!" and other cute things. Or being pulled down in a little red wagon. We chose to skip out on this part for several reasons. First, we were lacking in the little people department. None of our close friends or family had kids the right age and though you could probably hire someone out, I didn't want to do that. Secondly, I was in a wedding several years ago and the flower girl & ring bearer got to walk down the aisle with ME! I actually ended up carrying the younger of the two, and when it was time for him to be handed off to Grandpa and me stand beside the bride, well... lets just say it was an interesting transition. Neither of us wanted to go through that, so we didn't. We actually wanted to have an entirely kid-free wedding and we nearly succeeded! 

Some wedding traditions we DID participate in:
-Cutting the cake/champagne toast (and by champagne I mean Miller Lite).
-First dance as bride and groom
-Having my dad walk me down the aisle
-Serving dinner (I was NOT about to starve) instead of "finger foods"
-Getting married by a church officiant (I surprised myself with this one)

What are some things you decided to skip when planning your own wedding?

 


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33 comments:

Christine said...

I love that you made your wedding your own! My husband and I go married by ourselves on a cruise and not only did we not wait to see each other before the wedding, but he even helped me zip up my wedding dress. It made it really special for us.

Sarah said...

Love this post. I skipped a few too--we didn't do engagement pics, I skipped the veil at the last minute, I only had a flower girl, and we totally had a "first look"--which was probably the best decision ever. I was ready to party with all of my friends and family, not take pictures right after! :)

Kayla MKOY said...

I think no two weddings are alike and I love that! Being a photographer, it's so fun to see how couples choose to incorporate "traditions" or new things as well, into their days! Your day was perfect, because it was yours!! :)

Kristyn said...

We didn't do many of the traditional things either. We just aren't very traditional people. But we did send out Save the Dates since our wedding was in a remote location. We didn't have a flower girl or ring bearer because we couldn't choose. I probably wouldn't have done a veil if my mom's didn't end up working out so well and matching my dress.

Peachfully Chic said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Peachfully Chic said...

I agree... there's no need in doing everything that you're supposed to do if it doesn't fit for the bride and groom. While I kept some of traditions, I ended up not wearing a veil either! :)

xo - Allie

Cassie Lee @ Sage the Blog said...

We skipped all of these too (except the dances- but we weren't traditional with them either). I'm so glad with the decision not to do most of these things- especially the bouquet/garter toss- yuck.

Ashley LaMar said...

I skipped almost all of these too. We didn't send Save the Date cards, didn't toss a bouquet/garter, didn't wear a veil, didn't have a ring bearer and didn't do any dances beyond our first and mine with Dad. Actually...it sounds like we had the same wedding! :)

A Life Less Traveled said...

We also skipped the ring bearer/flower girl as well.

Kati Rose @ Constantly Seeking Wonder said...

I think sometimes people can get so bogged down with traditions that they feel they HAVE to do them all. When really, a wedding is YOUR day and it needs to feel like you.

Kels @ BlonderSide said...

My brother and his wife had an "untraditional" wedding in many of these aspects as well but it was still by fat the best darn wedding I've ever been to! It matched with the couple and their style so it was perfect!

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